Nowadays, everyone is in a rush, and I mean rush, to find someone to cuddle with, be with, and hold hands with. Where are the days when boys and girls took time to get to know each other deeply before saying ‘I love you’ to each other? No, make that, before they get into a relationship? Today, a meeting, a simple text message, sometimes even a hello, is enough to start a relationship, to make one utter those three words. Gone are the days when it took men and women months, years, to get to know each other. Now, people start and end relationships as quickly as they change their clothes. And we all know most of them don’t end up the way they expected to.

So I thought about the Top 5 reasons why you shouldn’t be so eager to get into a relationship, or a new one.

5. Your ex has a new boy/girl.

Just because your former flame has moved on, doesn’t mean you should get it on with someone new too. You have to deal with your break-up first, try to take some time to fully grasp and understand what went wrong with the first one, before jumping into a new one. Do you really want to start something new without understanding why the last one didn’t work out? Let me rephrase that. Do you really want to jump unprepared, into the unknown, with the possibility of getting your heart broken AGAIN? I didn’t think so.

4. You haven’t moved on. 

I know most people can attest to the fact that the only way one can really move on is if he/she found someone new. The hopeless romantic in me would like to believe this, that someone new, a prince charming, could save my broken heart. But the truth is, only YOU can save your broken heart. No matter how many guys and girls you try to hook up with, fall in love with, and be with, unless your heart has really moved on — forgiven, forgotten, understood, you will never be able to enjoy and give your best to that someone new. So save yourself and this innocent person some heartache. Move on before falling, again.

3. You have responsibilities/other priorities.

If you cannot prioritize your relationship, don’t get into one. Don’t be a selfish bastard/bitch. We get into a relationship because we love each other. And loving each other means being each other’s priority. Some people have all the time in the world for each other, but it doesn’t mean they prioritize each other. Others don’t see each other often, but they are each other’s priorities. The worst is, not having time for each other and not being each other’s priority. So before you throw yourself into another relationship, think about it. Can you prioritize this person? Or is he/she just another time/loneliness/boredom killer?

2. You have mommy/daddy issues.

Never use another person as a daddy/mommy substitute. If you have unresolved issues with your parents, don’t take it out on another person. A boyfriend or girlfriend will NEVER fill in that empty space your dad or mom left. If you think a boyfriend or girlfriend will make that sadness mommy or daddy caused go away, think again.

1. You feel alone, unhappy, incomplete.

“Fall in love when you are READY, not when you are LONELY.” So what if all your friends are getting engaged, getting married, etc. You shouldn’t find love just because everyone around you has found theirs. Love isn’t just about taking the loneliness and unhappiness away, and it isn’t about completing you too. Whether or not you are with someone, loneliness can creep in. Unhappiness can set in. No human being can ever complete you. Don’t depend your happiness on another person. It never works. You know it.

So if you’re a lonely, problematic, busy bee, don’t get into a relationship. Don’t ruin someone else’s life just because you’re unhappy with yours. Get into a relationship if you are mature enough to handle it and prioritize it, not because you feel sad and alone.


Posted by in experience, insight, little reminders, relationships